Donna Adair.com

It has been a while since I have written on this blog. It has been a while since I picked up where I left off from any sense of normalcy. If you are anything like me, it took you over a week to get your bearings. We as humans do not like change. The entire world is hurting. There is suffering and loss of life. Family members have been lost. Businesses have suffered losses. Family members and individuals are out of work. There is uncertainty all around.

You know all of this. It is not news to you. As a child I felt safe an secure. How did my parents do it? They did not allow me to see certain videos, watch various movies, and tried to give me the best possible life with what they had. Right now we can do is give our best to our friends, family, parents, and neighbors and try to uplift each other.

Who remembers Ghostbusters 2? I remember watching Ghostbusters, in a movie theater when it came out. It is a goofy movie. Who knew that they could come up with a sequel?

In Ghostbusters 2, there is a red lake of evil and negativity in New York City that sparks a painting of an evil demon to come to life to take over the life a newborn baby and to be reborn. The Ghostbusters discover that talking nice to the evil slime causes it to turn pink. Spoiler alert, they then fill the Statue of Liberty with the pink slime and she moves and helps them turn the entire city into one big love-fest, therefore defeating the evil demon.

Not to make light in any of this, I think we all need to spark a little joy and happiness during this time. There are many ways to do this. There are ways to cope with the pain and suffering. It is natural to be scared. There is uncertainty. However, good always triumphs. Stay positive. Lift others up. Spread some of the Pink stuff…

Here are some suggestions:

Stay connected with family and friends. Now more than ever we use technology to do so. There is an app called Zoom, that will allow you to video chat with friends and family.

If you are a believer, pray. I pray continuously. Spend so time sending thoughts of healing and well being to everyone.

Read some positive educational materials. Watch some educational videos. Stay sharp. Most libraries let you check out digital copies of books. I signed up with Great Courses.

Find a sense of purpose. I am writing this blog to share my thoughts and offer encouragement. Do something. Share your gifts and talents. Celebrities are hosting free concerts online.

Set up a positivity play list.

Only watch news once a week for 30 minutes or less.

Connect with positive and inspiring people. There are tons of Facebook Groups out there.

Make a list of things you are grateful for. There are things that I miss, now that I can’t do them.

Encourage others. Teachers rock! They are sending information for the kids to do. They are not required to do that. Some are reading books and posting the videos online.

Make a list of everything you have been putting off doing around the house and do one or two of those items on your list.

Try to see the glass half full. Don’t complain. You can’t go anywhere? You can stay in your pajamas all day or a few days, if you choose. Less laundry.

Try not to post any false news updates.

Get your exercise in. 30 minutes a day. Do squats every hour. It does not have to be complicated.

Drink water.

Eat nutritious foods. Everyone talks about not having enough Ramen Noodles. The grocery stores are full of fresh fruits and vegtables.

Get outside. Spend some time on your patio. Grill that nutritious dinner.

Make a list of some things you can do, that will help others, but keep you safe. Donate some money, leave notes of encouragement on sidewalks in chalk, donate food, and drop of supplies to needy elderly neighbors.

Give everyone grace, including your kids if you are schooling them from home.

Be sure to spread more pink around.

Cleaning Up

Today is a day of rest. However, there is work to be done. The kids rested Monday through Saturday. They did help out occasionally with bringing in the groceries and washing the dishes when asked. One of them continually finds a way to make excuses and get out of it.

One of them is my toughest child to deal with. She has a strong spirit. Her path is set in motion. There is no stopping her. When asked to deviate from her plan, she will put up a fight. Although, I admire her spirit, I want her to comply with my request.

You can’t make anyone do anything in this world. I will find another technique. She likes to compete. I know this. So, I have to make a game out of competing with a prize. Over the years, I have gotten smarter about it. It is not going to be the prize that she will receive. Rather, she will get points toward a prize that she will get at a later date.

It requires consistency and teamwork on our parts. If both parents are not on board, it does not work. If it is not reinforced daily, it is not effective. I will clean up my act and then get the kids cleanning.

New Routine

I listened to a podcast about shaking things up. This decade is going to be different than the last. With the kids I want to instill several ideas. My approach will be different than in the past. I have learned some things that work better.

I see other parents doing some innovative tactics to help their kids become more responsible. She gave them all titles and pays them an allowance for completing their jobs. I don’t believe in allowances. I think it is cool to give them titles and write a little job description.

Kids need to know what the boundaries are. Having a description of what you want them to do is a great idea. Techers have been doing that forever. When I subbed in a classroom, the kids knew exactly where everything was at and what the teacher expected from them. If you deviated from that routine, it threw them off.

I do know that kids do need a routine in order to feel safe. The advice I got to shake things up made me happy. I think even kids need a little variety. Instead of the same thing on Tuesdays, maybe make a different meal. I am planning on changing things up. However, the basic structure will be there for my kids. I am going to take care of me. I know if I am healthy and happy, then my kids will be healthy and happy.

Classroom Lessons

I had this idea about what I wanted to learn as a substitute teacher. I was out to prove that certain ideas were not taught in classrooms. However, I am wrong about whether or not leadership principles are taught in classrooms. I know there are topics teachers cannot cover.

What occurred to me from watching lots of teachers go about their craft, is that they do teach by their examples of leadership. I have had the privilege of working some of the most passionate, enthusiastic, talented, and mindful teachers. They are really good at what they do and they pour their heart and souls in to what they teach.

They are concerned about their students. They want to learn new things and be innovative in the classroom. If you look around the classrooms, you will see lots of posters and sayings about the growth mindset. There is no course which is set up to teach kids this. I have been witness to teachers who are the greatest encouragers to their students.

There is still work to do. There are lessons that are taught in Kindergarten about treating people with kindness. In next breath a student might hit another one or call the other one names. The kids can forget those ideas quickly. Teachers have to diffuse the situation and remain calm.

There is no easy solution. Parents, Students, and Teachers have to work together for the greater good.

Negotiating with an eight year old today on what to wear. I would like her to wear a dress for picture day. She wants to wear overalls today. I tell her I would prefer that she wear a dress. After she tells me that she is a “tom boy”, I think about whether or not she really understands what a “tom boy” is. I let her know that I understand.

She has a friend that is a “tom boy”. She adores her friends. We end up compromising on her outfit. I told her that she can dress just about any way she would like with exceptions. I want her to express herself. However, I want her to know that she does not have to be like everyone else. She can find her own style. It is okay to be unique. If she wants to wear pink high tops with a dress, that is fine by me.

She can wear her jeans, shorts, and t-shirts on any other day. I just wanted to have a picture of her in a nice dress. When she picked out her outfit, I complimented her on it. My youngest daughter wanted her hair like her big sister with the side shaved. I asked my daughter if she wanted it because other people have it or she truly wants to have that hair style.

While my kids are under my influence, I like to teach them that we all have a tendency to want to belong to something. However, when we try to be like everyone else, just to fit in, we can suffer. I want my girls to feel free to picture themselves as the unique individuals they are and express it. I want to challenge them to be originals. Why be a copy cat?

It is that time of year when the kids go back to school. Do you think that you will have it easier, because the kids are not at home? You would be mistaken. The kids are getting back into a routine. There is an adjustment.

No more leisurely days of summer. The kids don’t want to do homework. I have other things that need to be done. The prodding to complete the assignment gets exhausting. There is frustration all the way around.

My daughter is distracted by other tasks that have to be done. We have a guest in our house. She allowed our guest to help her with her homework. I had to make a deal with her so she would get all of her stuff done.

I do want her to realize that it is important to get rewards for taking action. I don’t want her to get prizes for doing her homework. I asked her to get all of her items together for school, listen, get her clothes out, brush her teeth, and listen to us.

I have my feelings about homework. I think they need to practice.

Going back to school, is something the kids are not looking forward to. The summer has been easy for them. I am trying to get them back into some type of routine. It has been difficult for me.

I have to plan way in advance. Meal plans are going to be for several months. The kids have pre-ordered supply kits. My son has some supplies from last year. I have to get them back into the habit of reading, writing, and adding up.

This year I am getting them involved in doing more chores. This includes doing their own laundry. I asked them to do the dishes so that I could get some other things done, that I wanted to accomplish. They have to get their outfits out the night before. We have to find their shoes ahead of time.

I am working on this going back to school in advance. I know that there will be days that I will not be able to do all that I can to help them. Making decisions in advance will help things run smoothly for going back to school.

My husband took the kids to a nature preserve. My son got a kayak and he tried it out. He loved being in the kayak. He took to it well. My son loves to be on the computer. It was a big change for him to be away from his computer and video games.

He is reluctant to give up his private time. I know he tends to be more introverted. Getting him in the habit of being more physical is not easy. I try to get all of my kids in the habit of being more social and getting out in nature.

I am not as extroverted as I would like to be. I have to set the example. I used to not like being out in nature. Now, I know it is the best medicine. We have had many adventures together as a family going on hikes.

We have been taking advantage of some beautiful surroundings in our local area. Coping with daily stress can be a challenge. Being out in nature can be the cure to what ails us. There are times when I can be alone out in nature and reflect on the beauty. As a family we are creating memories out in nature.

It is Tuesday evening. We decided to head to a local neighborhood. They had classic cars all lined up. We did not want to stay long. There were lots of people. Many beautiful vehicles in mint condition. The best part is that we had a meal together at a restaurant.

We don’t eat out much. We had a wonderful meal made with fresh ingredients imported from Italy. It was made just right. I had more than enough. It was a great meal. Even the kids finished every bite.

They were not so concerned about the cars. They wanted to get back home. They were happy that we got to go to the park after dinner. It makes me happy that they like to go to the park.

We talked about how careful those drivers have to be to take care of their vehicles. It is kind of like families. Take care of yourself and your family so that the relationships last a long time. We have to be careful not to bang into each other. Some things can’t be buffed out. It is great to spend time together. We can cruise down memory lane with the memories that we create taking the time to cherish each member of our family.

The kids went to the park together. They know the benefits of being active. They see my husband and I being active. There are times when we were not as active. I stress to them how important it is to take it all in.

They have days off school for the summer. They can hang loose and have some fun. There are no strict schedules. They know they have to get ready for bed in a little while and go through a routine of brushing their teeth.

I could emphasize the need to get back into their studies. I had to prioritize on thing. That is to get exercise in every day. Get them outside. They can play video games any time and watch TV in the evenings.

I would rather take a walk and have them follow suit. I fee that the other areas will flow shortly. I want to focus on one area at a time. For now, it will be taking walks and getting plenty of fresh air. Your body needs to be totally worn out to have a restful sleep. If they get enough sleep they will be happier. If they are happier they will be more productive. For now, they will take a walk.